Yesterday, my friend Johanna wrote an excellent post about “the reality of life lived in tension,” which really resonated with where I am right now. Daniel and I have had many similar discussions, and by tension, I’m not referring to marital tension! 🙂
“Cast your bread upon the waters,
for you will find it after many days.”
For now, I feel we are in a season of more transitions and greater tensions, yet regardless of what season of life we are in, there will always be tensions, and more of the kinds Johanna wrote about.
My mind bears the tension of being full with ideas and thoughts I need to get out, but can’t possibly record, here and elsewhere. (It is not for lack of topics, but lack of time that has left this little blog dry.) And yet, the need to invest myself elsewhere right now leaves weeks with scattered and “dry” posting.
The tension of daydreaming, dreaming and planning and the tension of pushing wholeheartedly toward those goals in a way that leaves us little time and mental space to dream as before.
And yet, not all tensions hold black and white opposites. Some are a long gray line. The balancing is easier than it looks, but harder than it once seemed. And the days can be held in place with anchor points and rhythms.
I love how Johanna closes her article:
While I usually find myself completely frustrated with my internal struggles with these tensions of life, I’ve also come to be grateful for them. They cause me to evaluate more often than I otherwise would. Sometimes I need to pull myself up and do, and other times I need to acknowledge that this is just not my season for that.
It’s in the meeting of these tensions that life is lived. Sometimes pushing ourselves, other times holding back. Sometimes saying ‘yes’, other times ‘no.’ Sometimes doing, sometimes resting.
Going to Ecuador was my season of slowing down. It was needed, and it energized me in ways I didn’t expect. Like in Biblical times of feasting then fasting, fasting then feasting, each is necessary for us to fully appreciate the other.